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The mouse did not notice this question, but hurriedly went on, found it advisable to go withEdgar Atheling to meet William and offer him thecrown.
William's conduct at first was moderate. But theinsolence of his Normans,
How are you getting on now, my dear? It continued,turning to Alice as it spoke.
As wet as ever, said Alice in a melancholy tone,it doesn't seem to dry me at all.
In that case, said the dodo solemnly, rising toits feet, I moved that the meeting adjourn,
for the immediate adoption of more energeticremedies.
Speak English, said the eaglet. I don't know themeaning of half those long words,
and, what's more, I don't believe you do either.And the eaglet bent down its head to hide a smile,
some of the other birds tittered audibly.
What I was going to say, said the dodo in anoffended tone was,
that the best thing to get us dry would be acaucus race.
What is a caucus race? said Alice, not that shewanted much to know,
but the dodo had paused as if it thought thatsomebody ought to speak,
and no one else seemed inclined to say anything.
Why, said the dodo, the best way to explain it isto do it.
And, as you might like to try the thing yourself,some winter day,
I will tell you how the dodo managed it.
First it marked out a race course, in a sort ofcircle, the exact shape doesn't matter, it said,
and then all the party were placed along thecourse, here and there.
There was no one, two, three, and away, but theybegan running when they liked,
and left off when they liked, so that it was noteasy to know when the race was over.
However, when they had been running half an houror so, and were quite dry again,
the dodo suddenly called out the race is over.
And they all crowded round it, panting, andasking, but who has won?
This question the dodo could not answer without agreat deal of thought,
and it sat for a long time with one finger pressedupon its forehead,
the position in which you usually see Shakespeare,in the pictures of him,
while the rest waited in silence.
At last the dodo said, Everybody has won, and allmust have prizes.
But who is to give the prizes? Quite a chorus ofvoices asked.
Why, she, of course, said the dodo, pointing toAlice with one finger,
and the whole party at once crowded round her,calling out in a confused way, prizes!
prizes!
Alice had no idea what to do, and in despair sheput her hand in her pocket,
and pulled out a box of comfits, luckily the saltwater had not got into it,
and handed them round as prizes. There was exactlyone a-piece, all round.
But she must have a prize herself, you know, saidthe mouse.
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Of course, the dodo replied very gravely.
What else have you got in your pocket? He went on,turning to Alice.
Only a thimble, said Alice sadly.
Hand it over here, said the dodo.
Then they all crowded round her once more, whilethe dodo solemnly presented the thimble,
saying We beg your acceptance of this elegant thimble, and,
when it had finished this short speech, they allcheered.
Alice thought the whole thing very absurd, butthey all looked so grave that she did not dare
to laugh, and, as she could not think of anythingto say, she simply bowed, and took the thimble,
looking as solemn as she could. The next thing wasto eat the comfits,
this caused some noise and confusion, as the largebirds complained that they could not taste theirs,
and the small ones choked and had to be patted onthe back. However, it was over at last,
and they sat down again in a ring and begged themouse to tell them something more.
You promised to tell me your history, you know,said Alice, and why it is you hate,
C and D, she added in a whisper, half afraid thatit would be offended again.
Mine is a long and a sad tale, said the mouse,turning to Alice and sighing.
It is a long tale, certainly, said Alice, lookingdown with wonder at the mouse's tail,
but why do you call it sad? And she kept on puzzling about it while the mouse was speaking,
so that her idea of the tale was something likethis. Fury said to a mouse, that he met in the
house, Let us both go to law, I will prosecuteyou. Come, I'll take no denial, we must have a
trial, for really this morning I've nothing to do.Said the mouse to the cur, such a trial,
dear sir, with no jury or judge, would be wastingour breath. I'll be judge, I'll be jury, said
cunning old Fury, I'll try the whole cause, andcondemn you to death. You are not attending,
said the mouse to Alice severely. What are youthinking of? I beg your pardon, said Alice very
humbly, you had got to the fifth bend, I think? Ihad not, cried the mouse, sharply and very
angrily. I not, said Alice, always ready to makeherself useful, and looking anxiously about
her. Oh, do let me help to undo it. I shall donothing of the sort, said the mouse, getting up
and walking away. You insult me by talking suchnonsense. I didn't mean it. Pleaded poor Alice.
But you're so easily offended, you know. The mouseonly growled in reply. Please come back
and finish your story. Alice called after it, andthe others all joined in chorus, yes, please do.
But the mouse only shook its head impatiently, andwalked a little quicker.
What a pity it wouldn't stay, sighed the lorry, assoon as it was quite out of sight, and an old
crab took the opportunity of saying to herdaughter, ah, my dear. Let this be a lesson to
you never to lose your temper. Hold your tongue,ma, said the young crab, a little snappishly.
You're enough to try the patience of an oyster. Iwish I had our Dinah here, I know I do,
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said Alice aloud, addressing nobody in particular.She'd soon fetch it back.
And who is Dinah, if I might venture to ask thequestion? said the lorry.
Alice replied eagerly, for she was always ready totalk about her pet, Dinah's our cat. And she's
such a capital one for catching mice you can'tthink. And oh, I wish you could see her after the
birds. Why, she'll eat a little bird as soon aslook at it. This speech caused a remarkable
sensation among the party. Some of the birds hurried off at once, one old magpie began wrapping
itself up very carefully, remarking, I really mustbe getting home, the night air doesn't
suit my throat. And a canary called out in atrembling voice to its children, Come away,
my dears. It's high time you were all in bed. Onvarious pretexts they all moved off,
and Alice was soon left alone. I wish I hadn'tmentioned Dinah, she said to herself in a
melancholy tone. Nobody seems to like her downhere, and I'm sure she's the best cat in the
world. Oh, my dear Dinah. I wonder if I shall eversee you anymore. And here poor Alice began
to cry again, for she felt very lonely and low-spirited. In a little while, however,
she again heard a little pattering of footsteps inthe distance, and she looked up eagerly,
half hoping that the mouse had changed his mind,and was coming back to finish his story.
Chapter 4. The Rabbit Sends in a Little Bill.
It was the white rabbit, trotting slowly backagain, and looking anxiously about as it went,
as if it had lost something, and she heard it muttering to itself the Duchess.
The Duchess! Oh my dear paws! Oh my fur and whiskers! She'll get me executed,
as sure as ferrets are ferrets. Where can I havedropped them, I wonder?
Alice guessed in a moment that it was looking forthe fan and the pair of white kid gloves,
and she very good-naturedly began hunting aboutfor them, but they were nowhere to be seen,
everything seemed to have changed since her swimin the pool, and the great hall,
with the glass table and the little door, hadvanished completely.
Very soon the rabbit noticed Alice, as she wenthunting about, and called out to her in an
angry tone, Why, Marianne, what are you doing outhere? Run home this moment, and fetch me a pair
gloves and a fan. Quick, now! And Alice was somuch frightened that she ran off at once in
the direction it pointed to, without trying toexplain the mistake it had made.
He took me for his housemaid, she said to herselfas she ran. How surprised he'll be when he finds
out who I am! But I'd better take him his fan andgloves, that is, if I can find them.
As she said this, she came upon a neat littlehouse, on the door of which was a bright brass
plate with the name W. Rabbit engraved upon it.She went in without knocking and hurried upstairs,
in great fear lest she should meet the real Marianne, and be turned out of the house before
she had found the fan and gloves. How queer itseems, Alice said to herself, to be going
messages for a rabbit. I suppose Dine'll besending me on messages next. And she began fancying
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the sort of thing that would happen, Miss Alice.Come here directly, and get ready for your walk.
Coming in a minute, nurse. But I've got to seethat the mouse doesn't get out. Only I don't
think, Alice went on, that they'd let Dine a stopin the house if it began ordering people about
like that. By this time she had found her way intoa tidy little room with a table in the window
and on it, as she had hoped, a fan and two orthree pairs of tiny white kid gloves. She took upthe
fan and a pair of the gloves, and was just goingto leave the room, when her eye fell upon a little
bottle that stood near the looking-glass. Therewas no label this time with the words
drink me, but nevertheless she uncorked it and putit to her lips. I know something interesting
is sure to happen, she said to herself, whenever Ieat or drink anything, so I'll just see what
this bottle does. I do hope it'll make me growlarge again, for really I'm quite tired of being
such a tiny little thing.
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