入院生活の始まり
Welcome to Kevin's English Room Podcast.
Hello.
Hello, hello.
So you're back.
Yes, that's right.
I'm back from the hospital.
First podcast.
Yeah, I'm back.
No, I mean, I have many questions.
I have many things too that I want to know.
But honestly, I don't know where to start.
What's the one thing that you want to know the most?
No, I mean, I was wondering, like, the hospital food.
病院での日常
That's true, yeah.
But that's, like, too...
Really not important, like, after hearing all of...
Sorry, it's like...
I'm like, hey, what about the hospital food?
That's just too...
Nothing.
Yeah, man.
Yeah.
No, that...
So tell me, after the surgery, you...
So you...
So you spent 24 hours at the ACU, right?
ACU, yes.
And then after that, you moved to the...
個室?
Your room.
And then how did you spend the days in the...
Right.
So, the hospital scheduling is usually...
You wake up at 6 and sleep at 9.
Okay.
That's your daily routine.
Okay, okay.
Shoto is at 9.
Okay, okay.
So you gotta go to sleep at 9.
I adjusted to that.
I was like, why would I stay overnight?
I'm gonna follow the hospital schedule.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And I did.
So you wake up at 9.
The nurses come.
They take your blood.
You get some medicine.
And then the janitor comes in,
cleans your room, cleans your toilet.
Very kind ojisan, by the way.
Very kind.
Okay.
So what was your room like?
Like, you have your room, bed, I guess.
That's right.
I have my room, I have my bed, TV.
TV, okay.
I got a fridge and a small desk
where I can do, like, a little work.
And private toilet.
And a private tearai basho.
And a mirror.
That's it.
Okay, okay.
And a closet.
And a closet.
Yeah, okay, it was pretty good.
Like, decent.
Yeah, it was, yeah.
So that's that.
After breakfast comes at 8.
Okay.
Yeah.
Yeah, breakfast comes at 8.
But did you, like, eat things?
So the thing is, I was not allowed to eat.
Yeah.
Two days before surgery and five days after surgery.
Five days after surgery?
Right.
Okay.
And nothing went down my throat.
Food-wise, probably seven days.
Okay.
So...
So tenteki was...
Tenteki was the only supply of energy I had.
Okay.
That's right.
Okay.
Yeah.
No water.
Oh.
No food.
Nothing.
So I didn't have breakfast.
So yeah.
Okay, okay.
Breakfast doesn't come at 8.
Nothing comes at 8.
Were you, like, thirsty?
I was surprisingly not that thirsty.
Oh, okay.
It was weird.
But I was not that thirsty.
I was a little bit hungry.
Okay.
But, like, not so hungry to the point where I'd break down.
Okay.
It was just, huh, a little bit hungry.
医者の診察
That's it.
Oh.
That's it.
Maybe the tenteki works.
Yeah, I guess the tenteki is working and doing its thing.
Energy is, like, full.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, that's...
Funny how that works, but, yeah.
Right, and then...
Okay.
And then after that, you usually have your main doctor come in.
Okay, okay.
Check you up, like, how's it going.
入院中の退屈
Okay.
And then after that, sometimes you have some scannings.
Okay, scannings.
You go down to the facility and then do some scanning.
Okay, okay, okay.
And then after that, you have nothing to do until dinner.
Okay.
Oh, sorry, lunch, which is at 12 o'clock.
Okay.
And then after lunch, which I don't have, you have nothing to do until dinner.
Which you don't have to do.
Which I do not have.
Oh, no.
And then you take a shower.
Okay.
Which I couldn't, was not allowed to take a shower.
Oh, no.
So, literally, after...
So, like, literally after, like, 7 a.m., I had nothing to do after that.
It was so...
Dude, boredom is fucking...
Boredom is fucking painful, dude.
Yeah.
Boredom is so fucking...
I wanted to call you.
Yeah.
Like, I wanted to call my friends.
Right, right, right.
But I couldn't.
You couldn't call?
I was too...
I can't talk to anybody.
Like, I needed energy to do it.
But I don't have the energy to do it.
Like, you were like...
Yeah, it's too discomforting to enjoy talks.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So, I mean, I don't remember what...
I mean, I brought in video games.
Okay.
But I couldn't...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
VR headset and everything.
Oh, boy.
VR set was not a choice, man.
It was fucking...
It was too discomforting.
Like, I can't move my face like this.
I mean, I can't do anything that needs focus.
I see.
I can't focus on a screen.
Okay.
So, I can't play video games.
Okay.
Like, I can look at a screen, but I can't really think through what I'm doing.
You know, it's just too...
There's so many other discomforting shit in my body.
Yeah.
I can't do work.
I can't play video games.
The only thing I did was put the TV on and sort of, like, half watch it.
Yeah, okay, okay.
I walk around the hospital floor very slowly.
With the katakana?
With the katakana.
Very, very slowly.
And there was a big window.
Okay.
In the, like, this hall.
Ah, I see.
Not your room.
Not my room, but there's this huge public hall.
And it had a huge window.
And you could see, like, the beautiful, you know, sky view of Tokyo.
That, I just stared at that.
Yeah.
That's the three things that I did.
徐々に自由を得る
Three things.
Okay.
That was tough.
That was tough.
Okay.
That went on for, like, three days or so.
Then I started to be able to focus a little bit more.
Okay, okay.
So, I did some video games a little.
Oh, yeah, my wife came.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's great.
That's great.
That's great, yes.
And, yeah.
And then after that, you know, the pipes started coming out.
Oh, good, good, good, good.
Getting more free and, you know, good.
You can have your own freedom.
That's right.
That's right.
You know, I get disturbed by.
Right, right.
There's 7-Eleven on the basement floor.
So, you know, after the pipes are out, I go to 7-Eleven, you know, look around.
That's fun.
Looking around at 7-Eleven is fun, man.
Dude, 7-Eleven is so fun.
入院中の日常
So many colors and so many, like.
So many colors.
So many colors, man.
So many foods, so many stimulants.
That thing is fucking heaven, man.
Boy.
Well, yeah.
Magazine section.
Yeah.
Very fun.
Very fun.
Yeah.
Lots of people there too, you know.
Lots of people, yes.
Lots of people in the 7-Eleven, you know.
You got some families of different patients.
Yeah, yeah.
You got, you know, senseis, you know, eating.
And, you know, you got some businessmen trying to sell shit in the hospital.
People walking around.
Yeah, walking around, you know.
You know, old people, young people, you know.
Fun.
Very fun.
Very fun.
Community.
Very fun community.
Yeah.
Yes.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, later on, it gets easier and easier.
Yeah.
I did a little bit of work.
Yeah.
I even went outside once.
Oh, good.
You know, to get some fresh air.
Good, good.
I probably was not allowed to, but I was like, fuck it.
My mental health was more important.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
My mental health was more important.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I didn't go too far.
I just went out to the hospital.
Got some fresh air and went back.
Yeah.
That's good.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, that's kind of it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It's like, it makes me laugh, but at the same time, it makes me, like, cry kind of.
Yeah, right?
It's so sad.
Yeah.
It's like.
Right?
Yeah.
I don't know.
To imagine.
Yeah.
What I went through, right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
退院後の課題
But after de-hospitalized, comes another hurdle, which I'm struggling with right now.
I said in the last episode, the thing called the LARS, L-A-R-S, I mean, two days ago, I
had to go poop, I'm counting, 24 times.
24 times?
24 times.
A day?
Yes.
That's.
Disasterous.
That's tough.
That is fucking disastrous.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Is it, like, 10 times in the morning, 10 times in the lunchtime, or, like, is that?
Yeah.
So, right after you eat is when you get a lot the most.
So, after I woke up, I went to the bathroom, four, five, six, seven, eight times.
Okay.
And after I ate lunch, I went there five times.
And after that, throughout the day, I went once or twice every hour until bedtime.
Yeah.
Okay.
I see.
You can't.
I can't do anything without thinking about going to the bathroom, and that's fucking
tough.
Yeah.
And I'm still adjusting.
You know, it's only been a week after de-hospitalization, and I'm still.
The first several days after de-hospitalization was too unstable for me to think about anything.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, it's been three or four days after I've started trying to fight back the lars, and
right now, what I'm doing is, so, they gave me, I don't know, this medicine to have the
poop out more often because you don't want, what you don't want to have happen is a heavy
bempi.
You don't want that happening.
Oh, I see.
入院後の回復
I see.
So, they don't want that happening, so they gave me this thing to soften out your poop
so that it prevents you from bempi.
I decided to cut back on that, see what happens, because with that medicine, because it's getting
softer, I'm pooping out 24 times a day.
Let me cut back on that a little bit and see what's happening, and it's day two of not
doing anything.
It kind of does feel like bempi, though.
I went to the bathroom, like, four times, but, like, barely nothing comes out, but you
still have, it feels like a huge shit is inside me, and that's discomforting as well.
Yeah.
I don't know how to deal with this.
I think my body's still finding a way.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I see.
I see.
Yeah.
So.
But, isn't that medicine something you need to, like, take?
No.
The doctor was like, hey, you can try to, yeah, yeah, you need to take it, but, yeah,
you can adjust it on your own.
Okay, okay, I see.
It's kind of like that.
Yeah.
So.
That's that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, maybe tough for you to come to this place, like, maybe, like, riding a train?
So the thing is, there's several different symptoms of LARS, and one of them being you
can't hold back your shit, but I don't have that.
I can hold in my shit to, like, I can go without pooping, like, if I try to hold it in, even
though I have the urge to do, but, like, I can, yeah, I can control my body to, like,
hold it in.
That I can do.
Oh, I see.
Yeah.
So.
Okay, okay.
Yeah.
So.
So you can.
That's good.
Kind of move it around.
That's right.
That's right.
Kind of.
That's right.
How many days, like, when did you, when was the day that you de-hospitalized, was it like
a week ago?
Yeah.
I think exactly a week ago.
Exactly.
Sorry.
A week and one day ago.
Okay.
Sorry.
A week and two days ago.
Okay.
So last Saturday.
Yeah.
Saturday.
Yeah.
That's right.
Yeah.
Okay.
So it's only a week.
Yeah.
That's right.
Yeah.
But you look fine.
Yeah.
You good?
I'm actually, yeah.
Honestly, like.
Yeah.
I mean, I went to day trip.
Okay.
Yeah.
And I was okay.
Oh, good.
Yeah.
Even though I had to be careful with the bathroom situation and whatever.
I can move.
Okay.
I can eat.
Okay.
I'm eating anything I want.
Oh.
Yeah.
They gave me no restriction on the food.
Like, just don't go too hard on the.
I know.
Oh, I see.
Don't go too hard on that.
Other than that.
Okay.
Like, don't go too much on the alcohol, of course.
Yeah.
Don't go too much on the smoking.
I don't smoke, though.
But, yeah, that's what they told me.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah.
So I don't have that much restriction.
So.
Okay.
Okay.
I'm eating the same amount.
Yeah.
I have a lot of.
Good.
Good.
Good.
Good.
Yeah.
You're trying.
Yes.
I'm trying to lift heavy things for three months.
For three months.
Yeah.
Because.
Because.
Right.
入院とその影響
It's going to open again.
The core of your body.
Yeah.
I'm not doing the stomach.
The abs.
Yeah.
I'm doing the arms and the legs.
That I'm doing.
That I'm doing.
Okay.
Okay.
Yeah.
Good.
Good.
Good.
Yeah.
So you're exercising.
Yes.
I'm, like, slowly running, too.
Slowly running.
Yeah.
It hurts, though, to run.
That kind of hurts, too.
What do you mean?
It pushes.
You know.
It pushes inwards.
The.
I think the.
Cut.
Sort of.
It's like.
I don't know.
But it's.
It's pushed.
To my body.
It kind of hurts.
Oh, so you can lay like this.
Yeah.
I can't.
I can't.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So, you know, the.
I guess the only good thing.
Well, not the only good thing, but I guess the one good thing is that supposedly there's
going to be an end to this.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Right.
Even though there are some people that has to live with us forever.
Okay.
Yeah, there's a small percentage of the people who the laws do not fix.
Okay.
Be there forever.
Okay.
So if I'm not that percentage, then ultimately there's going to be an end.
Right.
Even though it's not going to be completely the same.
Yeah.
I'm going to go back to the point where it doesn't really affect my everyday.
Yeah.
I see.
Yeah.
In a few weeks or a few years.
A few weeks or a few years.
Yeah.
Okay.
Yes.
That is a mental struggle on its own.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So.
But, you know, I have to fight.
No.
Yeah.
I have to fight back.
I had a huge event happening.
Yeah.
In my 30s.
You know.
Got married.
Got cancer.
Yeah.
Fucking.
Fucking went through a huge perjury.
Fucking.
True.
Fucking hell of a.
So true.
Hell of a year.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Hell of a year.
Uh huh.
It's like ups and downs.
Ups and downs.
And fucking.
Yeah.
Yeah, man.
I'm very stable mentally.
I mean, I've always known myself to be a very stable guy.
Yeah.
Others have told me I'm very stable mentally.
But honestly, I gotta say this two weeks, I was a little bit unstable.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Honestly.
Yeah.
Like, what the fuck is happening in my body?
Like, you know, why the fuck happened?
Like that.
That kind of mentality.
It's fucking like.
I look at other people and I'm fucking.
They're having the time of their life.
Yeah.
Fuck.
Yeah.
I want to be like that too.
Yeah.
I have that feeling.
But.
Yeah.
I get it.
Every day.
I'm like, I'm adjusting to it.
You know?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I mean.
No, honestly.
It's like.
I've never.
Personally, I've never been hospitalized.
Yeah.
Or like I've.
I have like nobody.
Like my friends being hospitalized or like.
Yeah.
Being through all those things.
And it's like.
So it's for me like the first time to.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Like for me like the first time to.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Those stories from.
Uh-huh.
Like this close.
And yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Right.
You don't really get to hear that much story.
Yeah.
Anybody right?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Right.
Right.
Right.
Right.
You know.
I hear sometimes like.
入院体験の苦痛
Oh, I was you know being hospitalized and just.
You know, there's nothing to do and.
Doing shocking.
What's so terrible.
And just.
Yeah.
But it's like, this is the real thing, right?
Oh yeah, that's right.
This is the, you know...
The raw emotions that came up as I was going through the journey.
Which must be very, very tough, like physically and mentally.
Yeah, it was just as tough, like mentally just as tough as physically.
Maybe even more, I'd say.
I mean, I had the painkillers in me, so that was like manageable, but like mentally, that's
like, you had to deal with it, like you had to face it, so yeah.
You should...
Yeah, that's...
You see that building out there?
Which one?
That faraway building?
The...
The double building?
It's not a double, but like a pyramid-looking chair?
Yes, yes, it's over there.
That's the hospital that I was in.
Really?
Yeah.
That's the hospital I was in.
Was that the, like this shape?
Yeah.
Oh, I think that's it.
Wait, is it?
Yeah, I think...
That's...
Is that Shinjuku right there?
That's Shinjuku...
If it's not, then no, but...
Hmm, maybe not.
Shinjuku should have taller buildings.
Yeah.
Right?
I guess that one over there is like...
Isn't it like...
Sanchano building?
Oh, then okay.
Maybe...
Okay, I was wrong.
I was wrong.
It's not that.
Yeah, I guess that way.
Oh, that...
Okay, so, okay.
That's not...
I was wrong.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's not the hospital.
But...
Yeah.
So...
病院での喜び
I'll tell you about the positive things.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That happen in the hospital in the next episode.
The good things.
Do you...
Have them?
Oh, yeah.
I do, I do.
Like here?
Like the joys I...
Okay, okay.
Maybe the level of joy is so low that it might...
Like, it might depress you, but like...
No, no, no, no.
I mean...
I mean...
I mean...
I mean...
I mean...
I mean...
No, no, no, no.
I mean...
But there was a lot of, like, happiness and, like, joy...
Okay, okay.
Great.
...during the stay there, so...
Yeah, I want to hear that.
Yeah.
I want to hear that.
All right, so...
Thanks for listening, guys.
I mean...
Oh.
Sorry, you...
You're such a strong guy.
You fought through and just...
I mean, honestly...
You recovered and, like...
Honestly, I think I'm stronger.
Yeah.
Like, mentally and as a person, I think I'm fucking stronger.
Thank you all.
You should be proud of that.
Like, I...
Like, honestly.
I feel more thankful that I'm alive.
Yeah.
入院体験の共有
I look at people and I'm like, they might be going through some hard shit.
I'm nicer to people.
Yeah.
Not that I was never not nice, but, like, I'm, like, more empathetic to people.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I feel like a bigger person, really.
Honestly.
Yeah.
Honestly, you should be proud of that.
Yeah.
That I went through this, right?
Yes, yes, yes, yes.
And, like, survived through.
And you gained those experiences.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's a good thing.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's a great positive.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's a great positive starting off with.
Like, honestly, to me, like, you look like, I don't know, like Harry Potter.
Oh, do I?
Like, you, know, fought through all the, you know, fight against Voldemort, and, like,
finally got back and just, you know, became strong and...
I mean, it was a hell of a journey, though.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
Right.
So, yeah.
Yeah.
Talk to you about the good parts.
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Thank you.
Bye-bye.
