第5560回 EN Home Tensions＆Mental Fatigue

このエピソードは思考整理のための独り語りです。メンタルヘルスや発達特性を背景に、日常の悩 みや感情をそのまま話しています。聞き流しても問題ありません。

 This episode is a personal audio journal on daily struggles, mental health, andneurodiversity. It is meant to be listened to casually in the background.

このポッドキャストは、生きづらさ・メンタルヘルス・家庭問題を中心に、 日常で起きる出来事や思考を、感情を煽らず淡々と語る雑談ポッドキャストです。親子関係の衝突、家庭内トラブル、機能不全家族。 「普通」や「当たり前」とされる家族像や会話が成立しない現実を扱います。 発達障害（ASD / ADHD）、うつ病、双極性障害、不安障害、社会不安、幸福恐怖、強迫性障害（OCD）。 個人の特性と、家庭・社会環境が噛み合わないことで生じる問題を取り上げます。 宗教二世として育った経験から、 オカルトやスピリチュアルを信じて自分を誤魔化しながら生きることができない感覚についても語ります。 物事を都合よく解釈して安心することができず、 現実をそのまま見てしまうことによる生きづらさを扱います。 長期間の引きこもり、無職、就職活動の失敗、働けない現実。社会復帰の難しさや、将来への不安を、理想論ではなく事実として話します。 難病である潰瘍性大腸炎の可能性を抱えながら、 引きこもり状態のため十分な治療に繋がれない状況と、体調不安が日常生活に与える影響についても触れます。 人間関係のトラウマや、 新たなトラウマを作らないために距離を取るという選択。 人と関わる必要性を理解しつつも、発達障害が理解されにくい現実の中での葛藤を語ります。 哲学やニヒリズムを背景に、 存在の意味を求めるのではなく、 世の中を都合よく解釈する考え方そのものへの違和感や、人の思考の矛盾、浅はかさをスピリチュアルに逃げず考察します。 前向きさや希望を押し付ける番組ではありません。 答えを出すこともしません。 メンタルヘルス、発達障害、家庭問題、生きづらさを抱える人に向けた、静かで重めのトーク番組です。

This podcast focuses on mental health, neurodiversity, and family issues, discussed calmly and without emotional exaggeration. It covers parent-child conflict, dysfunctionalfamilies, and situations where so-called “normal” family dynamics do not work.Topics include ASD / ADHD, depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety disorders,social anxiety, fear of happiness, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD),exploring how personal traits clash with family and social environments.Growing up in a religious household, I talk about the inability to rely on occult or spiritual beliefs to comfort or deceive myself, and the difficulty of facing reality without convenient explanations. The podcast addresses long-term social withdrawal, unemployment, failed job searches, and the realistic difficulty of returning to society. I also discuss the possibility of living with ulcerative colitis, a chronic illness, while being unable to access proper treatment due to isolation, and how physical uncertainty affects daily life.Human relationships and trauma, choosing distance to avoid creating new wounds, and the struggle of living in a society where neurodiversity is rarely understood are recurring themes. Rather than seeking meaning, this podcastexamines how people conveniently interpret reality, the contradictions in human thinking, and social absurdities — without spiritual escape or comforting narratives. No self-help. No optimism. No answers. A quiet, heavy podcast forthose dealing with mental health issues, neurodiversity, family conflict, and the difficulty of living in reality as it is.

サマリー

ポッドキャストでは、家族の問題や英語学習の苦労について話し、北海道の蟹文化や日常の誤解から生じるトラブルに触れています。英語学習における音楽の重要性、特にR&Bに焦点を当て、学び方の自由と挑戦について考察しています。また、人間の記憶と意識、経験の再認識について議論されています。家庭内の緊張と精神的疲労に関する考慮が重要であり、日常生活に影響を与える様々な要因を探求しています。

家族と日常の問題

Life is hard? Yeah, it happens.

Family? Yeah, that too.

Developmental disability? It's not just that.

A conclusion? No conclusions.

Kurakuji?

Hello, welcome to my podcast. Thanks for tuning in.

This is a podcast where I talk calmly about life struggles and family issues.

Today, I will talk about family incidents and struggles of my learning English,

and until I think New Year's Day, until today, some problems,

and easy philosophy, my philosophy and family issue.

First corner is today's incident.

We are talking about club.

My local Hokkaido is famous for club.

Kegani, Zuwaegani, etc.

When I was watching the movie,

I said Kegani is popular in Hokkaido,

and she mentioned it's not yet.

But eventually she remarked,

Kegani and Tarabagani is famous for.

It's different from she said.

But it's common. It's common thing.

On my family, it happens every day.

She said something random.

It's a huge problem.

Next.

As I said previous episode,

I asked her please 100 soybeans for lunch,

but she used 120g soybeans.

She put in meal.

Today, we are talking about it.

I said,

before, you made a mistake.

She put in 120g,

but she didn't look like,

no feeling, put out this thing.

In other words, not apologize.

Next.

英語学習の苦労

Next is about my learning English.

I can heard,

recently,

I quit learning English by podcast.

I try to hear foreign music.

Music of America.

But I can't hear well enough.

And article of the site of translate for Japanese or English.

And using AI.

All of them was bad.

And translator of lyric is different.

It depend on website.

And way of learning English by music.

It bother me.

I'm not sure.

Way of learning English by music.

I was not sure.

What I should choose the song.

And yesterday, I realized.

I can learn English by recording podcast.

Something changed.

And I have a sound tool.

I use AI chat GPT.

And I also.

It also bother me.

That this word is used in daily life.

And specific focus on.

R&B.

I wanted to use R&B.

Because I'm particular.

And I wanted to talk about.

Something I can't understand.

But if I try to do this.

There is no limit.

Freedom.

But I search a lot of thing.

Eventually, I would not sure.

What to do next.

Yesterday, like this.

I was not sure.

So until midnight.

I search something about learning English.

And battery is on my mind.

Recently, it's decrease.

This decrease.

It's decrease too much.

Next.

不完全性定理についての考察

Next is easy philosophy.

Do you know the incomparably.

The incomparably this term.

Japanese.

In Japanese, it's called.

不完全性定理.

This prove.

That got.

Is nothing.

But.

Some people change this definition.

They said.

Human can't.

Human.

Brain of human.

Can't understand.

This thing.

But however.

That time.

Concept of got.

Can be zero.

This concept is nothing.

This cannot exist.

But.

The person of this thinking.

Is a lot of.

There is a lot of.

This thinking person.

You can find.

A lot of this.

Kind of this thinking people.

And they say.

Exist of got.

Mathematic can't prove.

Exist of got.

人間の記憶と意識

But.

This.

Definition is.

A nation and.

Obviously.

So got is.

You can find.

Got.

Next.

Next is about.

Next is about.

Consensus theory.

As I said.

Human.

Recognize something.

And consciousness.

Feel it.

Firstly.

This body recognize something.

For example.

Someone.

Listen someone watch.

And next second.

Like.

Watching a movie.

They feel something.

They feel something.

In other word.

They.

Human.

Watch.

Past.

Not now.

Not now.

They are watching past.

The past.

Not now.

Not in the future.

They watch past.

And memory is.

Changing.

Memory is always changing.

In other word.

Human.

Human maybe said.

I was not watching.

And I'm hearing.

This is real.

But.

Definition is.

So I think it is.

Illusion.

Real is illusion.

But I don't deny.

Exist.

Yes.

Alright.

Next.

When I doing something.

First time.

Sometimes I.

I'm touched.

But second time.

I'm not touched at all.

In other.

In other word.

I'm not.

I'm not moved.

I was surprised.

First time.

I'm surprised.

And.

I moved.

About it.

So second time.

No surprising.

So.

I'm not touched.

Next.

Next.

Next.

Moving to the next topic.

Last is.

About my learning English.

When I.

Listening the.

Foreign music.

When I wasn't watching the.

Tagist.

I can't understand.

I can't understand anything.

But.

When I.

Reading the.

Tagist.

It's different.

Between text and spell.

Pronunciation is different.

So.

I'm confused.

Alright.

Next is.

Hikimeshi corner.

Yesterday I had.

Potato croquette and.

Fried oyster.

It's different from.

Super hot one.

And cabbage.

Fried oyster.

Was a good texture.

Creamy and good.

Good flavor.

Oily.

Taste was well enough.

Good.

Thank you for listening.

Please follow this program.

See you again.