第5592回 EN Overthinking Patterns ＆ strange japanese is strange

このエピソードは思考整理のための独り語りです。メンタルヘルスや発達特性を背景に、日常の悩 みや感情をそのまま話しています。聞き流しても問題ありません。

 This episode is a personal audio journal on daily struggles, mental health, andneurodiversity. It is meant to be listened to casually in the background.

このポッドキャストは、生きづらさ・メンタルヘルス・家庭問題を中心に、 日常で起きる出来事や思考を、感情を煽らず淡々と語る雑談ポッドキャストです。親子関係の衝突、家庭内トラブル、機能不全家族。 「普通」や「当たり前」とされる家族像や会話が成立しない現実を扱います。 発達障害（ASD / ADHD）、うつ病、双極性障害、不安障害、社会不安、幸福恐怖、強迫性障害（OCD）。 個人の特性と、家庭・社会環境が噛み合わないことで生じる問題を取り上げます。 宗教二世として育った経験から、 オカルトやスピリチュアルを信じて自分を誤魔化しながら生きることができない感覚についても語ります。 物事を都合よく解釈して安心することができず、 現実をそのまま見てしまうことによる生きづらさを扱います。 長期間の引きこもり、無職、就職活動の失敗、働けない現実。社会復帰の難しさや、将来への不安を、理想論ではなく事実として話します。 難病である潰瘍性大腸炎の可能性を抱えながら、 引きこもり状態のため十分な治療に繋がれない状況と、体調不安が日常生活に与える影響についても触れます。 人間関係のトラウマや、 新たなトラウマを作らないために距離を取るという選択。 人と関わる必要性を理解しつつも、発達障害が理解されにくい現実の中での葛藤を語ります。 哲学やニヒリズムを背景に、 存在の意味を求めるのではなく、 世の中を都合よく解釈する考え方そのものへの違和感や、人の思考の矛盾、浅はかさをスピリチュアルに逃げず考察します。 前向きさや希望を押し付ける番組ではありません。 答えを出すこともしません。 メンタルヘルス、発達障害、家庭問題、生きづらさを抱える人に向けた、静かで重めのトーク番組です。

This podcast focuses on mental health, neurodiversity, and family issues, discussed calmly and without emotional exaggeration. It covers parent-child conflict, dysfunctionalfamilies, and situations where so-called “normal” family dynamics do not work.Topics include ASD / ADHD, depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety disorders,social anxiety, fear of happiness, and obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD),exploring how personal traits clash with family and social environments.Growing up in a religious household, I talk about the inability to rely on occult or spiritual beliefs to comfort or deceive myself, and the difficulty of facing reality without convenient explanations. The podcast addresses long-term social withdrawal, unemployment, failed job searches, and the realistic difficulty of returning to society. I also discuss the possibility of living with ulcerative colitis, a chronic illness, while being unable to access proper treatment due to isolation, and how physical uncertainty affects daily life.Human relationships and trauma, choosing distance to avoid creating new wounds, and the struggle of living in a society where neurodiversity is rarely understood are recurring themes. Rather than seeking meaning, this podcastexamines how people conveniently interpret reality, the contradictions in human thinking, and social absurdities — without spiritual escape or comforting narratives. No self-help. No optimism. No answers. A quiet, heavy podcast forthose dealing with mental health issues, neurodiversity, family conflict, and the difficulty of living in reality as it is.

サマリー

このエピソードでは、孤独感や衝突、特に英語学習と性に関する誤解について話し合っています。英語の発音やアイドルへの応援を考えながら、自身の過去の夢や経験を反映させつつ、孤独の物語を語る様子が描かれています。また、ポッドキャストの言語選択や外国人リスナーへのアプローチについて考察し、日本語リスナーにとっての理解の難しさにも触れています。さらに、日本のテレビ番組のユニークなスタイルと、楽しさに対する異なる基準について議論が行われています。

孤独と誤解の探求

Loneliness, Conflict, and Misalignment with the World, トール・ペインリーです。

Hello, welcome to my podcast. This is a podcast where I talk commonly about life struggles and family issues.

Firstly, it's my characteristic of developmental disability.

I thought women don't like sexual things at all. It was wrong.

I heard they talk about these things with their friends.

When I was a child, I thought women don't like sexual things. I misunderstood.

Next, recently I've been learning English.

I came out this way, but I couldn't do it well.

No matter how much I practice, my pronunciation doesn't improve much.

Spanish pronunciation is similar to Japanese pronunciation.

However, English is best for reading people around the world.

I've been learning English for three months. I'm not sure.

Next, it happened a few days ago. It happened while changing clothes.

My father came home. Recently, I told Yoka.

If he came home when I changed clothes,

Don't answer the door even if he comes.

But a few days ago, she answered the door.

She said, I don't have only shoes.

I just gave him the shoes, so I thought it's no problem.

But it's the same thing. She made a mistake. It's the same thing as before.

And I noticed my wound doesn't heal.

My wound hasn't healed yet. I was shocked.

アイドルへの応援と英語の悩み

It's useless.

She said a lot, even though I can't do anything.

I thought it's useless. I can't do anything.

But she said a lot.

And a few days ago, I ended up sleeping.

But before that, I ended up sleeping in the afternoon.

So I regret and I hesitated to listen to the radio.

And I hesitated to...

I was wondering whether I should stop cheering for idols.

Next, I had a dream.

My mother was lying down and playing the victim.

And I said it would be embarrassing.

But she was lying.

And I also had a dream.

My father said he would take me home.

But I ended up waiting for three hours at the usual place in Norway.

But something similar happened before.

Next, it happened day before yesterday.

That was terrible.

I realized pronunciation doesn't matter in English.

I realized this thing.

So I was not sure whether I should quit English again.

Next,

There are more English speakers.

But when people listen to podcasts,

do most of them listen to their native language or English?

I was not sure.

And I realized

Latin people tend to like talking about the story of loneliness.

It's only listened to in the US and the UK.

That means it's only for native speakers for now.

I'm not aiming for a big success.

ポッドキャストと言語選択

But if I use Spanish,

number of impressions doesn't increase much.

However, considering the idea of blue ocean and red ocean,

it's hard to tell.

Let me continue.

Listeners would probably stick with this show

if I continue to talk in English on podcast.

If I do it on this show in English.

Listeners would probably stick with this show.

And I think I've been running this show for a long time.

It would probably be more discoverable if I did it in English.

That said,

if the show program title is in English,

it can be hard for Japanese listeners to understand.

And as a small show,

it's unlikely to reach non-native speakers.

Next.

プロセスへのこだわり

It's hard enough to reach foreigners on social media.

And it's hard to explain podcast to my parents.

Next is something I can understand.

Firstly,

even though it can be heated in a microwave,

they deliberately heat it in a pot.

Even though it can be heated in a microwave,

they deliberately heat it in a pot.

I can understand.

Next.

Even though they could go by bike,

they take a longer route.

They take a longer route and walk instead.

Reason is that attachment.

There's attachment to the process.

Sense of satisfaction or accomplishment.

Putting in extra effort gives them

a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment.

I understand.

Next.

日本のテレビ番組の特徴

About Japanese TV show.

Too many sound effects and on-screen text

and comedians and celebrities' reactions are over the top.

And different standards.

Standard of humor is strange.

I can't understand.

Extreme punishment games.

I can understand.

I can't understand.

What is funny?

What's funny?

I can't understand.

Japanese TV show is strange.

Next.

人間と動物の行動

People who end up doing harmful things

People who end up doing harmful things

end up tend to what feels like some kind of happiness.

They choose a brief moment of pleasure.

And resisting is usually the normal choice for Japanese people.

Resisting is a normal choice.

After all, I can't understand.

Animals don't seem to understand sex

as something connected to having children.

They don't seek pleasure.

They act to reduce discomfort

like scratching and itching.

This kind of behavior

isn't learned by watching.

Humans in the past said to have learned it through jokes and rumors

from people around them.

Thank you for listening. Please follow this channel. See you again.