00:00
Welcome to Kevin's English Room Podcast!
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We've got a voice message.
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Thank you.
Thank you.
So happy to share this.
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We always love the voice messaging.
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There we go.
So when was this from?
Who is this from?
It's from Akko-san.
Akko-san.
Thank you Akko-san.
Right.
This was sent on September 30th.
Okay.
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Are you ready?
I am ready.
Okay.
So the title is "A Bit Nervous Sending This."
Don't be.
It's okay.
Okay.
Do you think the microphone
catch that audio?
I think so.
Okay.
There we go.
Yeah.
Hello Kevin and Yano-chan.
My name is Akko.
I've been enjoying your YouTube videos and podcast.
I really love what you guys do.
You guys are amazing.
Thank you.
Thank you.
So today I want to ask you guys
if you have ever felt pressured to settle down.
Right now I'm 29 years old
and sometimes people ask me like
do you have a boyfriend
or are you actually making effort to meet someone
and I'm like I'm happy being single and living on my own
03:00
and I'm assuming we're only a few years apart
and I'm just curious about how guys of my age
feel about marriage and having their own family.
So let me know.
Thanks for picking this up.
Alright.
Yay.
Thank you.
Yes.
Alright.
Thank you Akko-san.
So that's from Akko-san.
A good topic here.
Yifu is a little bit nervous.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That was great, wasn't it?
Yeah.
That was great.
I think this is a topic that is very great timing
because you told me the other day about marriage, right?
How we, how us, we were like not really thinking about marriage
but you just realized that your friends from other communities
they've already had kids
and like the norm for them was so different from ours
and that you felt sort of like a disconnect or a gap.
Yeah.
Talk to me about that.
You know we were from the same college, same group.
Yeah.
Right?
Yeah.
We have so many friends in there.
And in that group we are like really
like there are so many people who are still single,
enjoying a happy life.
Yeah.
Not married, having no kids.
Yeah.
Like we are.
Yeah.
There are so many people like that.
So we don't like never feel the pressure from them in this topic.
But when I went to a party of hippo
and I gathered some friends who have been friends since when I went to France
and we met four people and they were all married.
Same age?
Same age.
And they some of them have kids.
How old were they?
The kids?
Yeah.
Like little babies.
Babies?
Like one.
Yeah.
Or like less than a year.
Yeah.
Got it.
And that was a lot of surprising to me.
Okay.
Because I've never been in the group who like where like the most of the people are married already.
Yeah.
Having kids and talking about their family life.
Yeah.
You know, that was quite surprising to me.
And I was like, oh, okay.
This happens to me.
Yeah.
I felt a pressure actually.
Okay.
They were like, oh, oh, really?
06:00
You're still single?
Like, you know, well, yeah, I am.
Yeah.
So it was like, it was like a, like a surprise for them that you at this age are still solo.
Yeah.
Wow.
Okay.
And they told me like, oh, I thought they told me like that.
Oh, I thought you are like moteru and you're you can you can you can find a girl and those things.
And I mean, well, maybe it's not the moment to me.
So yeah.
But you know, it was a little different.
Yeah.
It was a little different.
Yeah.
Me and them.
Now, how do you feel after several days?
I don't feel any like the pressure was really like, like, the amount of pressure was very light, really like, but still I can I can.
And that reminds me something.
I don't feel any pressure from that.
But I kind of start thinking about those topics.
Oh, yeah.
Since then.
So I, I'm still like thinking about that.
Okay.
Yeah.
Not the pressure, but like fairly like think about it.
Okay.
Yeah.
I mean, I've always thought that.
I don't know.
I was I wasn't I was never confident on how much of a quote unquote peer pressure would affect my desire of wanting to get married.
Yeah.
Right now I feel like I won't.
But who knows, right?
When all my friends start getting married.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And who knows what I would start want.
Maybe the pressure would get me.
Yeah.
Or subconsciously start wanting kids.
Yeah.
Yeah, true.
I've never thought that I would have like been attacked by any pressure.
Yeah.
But actually, I, I, you know, I had the pressure that at least a little bit.
So your story doesn't sound like it's nothing related to me.
It just feels like someday it would happen to me.
Yeah.
And it was just just you that had it first.
So like people like me and you, we're always in like a group who were majority is majority is single.
But like people like so many people are, you know, in the group where majorities are already married and singles are like always been like pressured.
09:12
Then people start thinking about that like seriously.
Right.
That, you know, I understand that.
Yeah.
I understand that.
You're right.
I understand that too.
Yeah, that can be happen.
Yeah.
But just like what Ako-san said, there's I, we got to admit that there are stigmas and like there are true, you know, things around the there's like a like a like not being married.
Mm hmm.
Being single.
Like after 30s is like kind of like, oh, you're not really fitting the society kind of vibe, right?
Mm hmm.
It's a stigma. They have it.
So that's that's kind of bad.
And I feel like right now I feel like, you know, fear based marriage is not doesn't lead to happiness.
Of course.
Like, you know, like, oh, I'm going to get left out. I'm going to get married.
This doesn't seem right.
Yeah.
But who knows, right?
Yeah.
Maybe the fear could get me and I'll just turn myself over someday.
Yeah.
Yeah.
But right now that's my take on it.
Yeah.
I agree with you. I don't feel anything right now.
But we never know after when we were like 50.
I know.
Still single.
We never know.
I have no kids.
I know, right?
Yeah.
But yeah.
But we have to like think about it at least.
Yeah.
Start thinking about it.
Yeah.
We do.
Yeah.
We do. We do. We do.
But right now, how do you feel?
Do you want to get married?
No.
You still want to do your thing?
Or do you just have like a 10% of like, you're starting to look into that?
I mean, that hasn't changed.
I not now.
Yeah.
But I'm here.
Yeah.
But in the future, I would love to have my family and kids.
And yeah, that's my dream.
But not now.
It's exactly the same.
Yeah.
I mean, me too.
Not now.
But someday I feel like I will.
Yeah.
Right?
All right.
That's a...
Thanks for listening, guys.
Thank you.
Thank you, Ako-san.
12:00
Yeah.
Thank you for the voice message.
