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The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes by Arthur ConanDoyle
I, a scandal in Bohemia.
I, to Sherlock Holmes she is always the woman.
I have seldom heard him mention her under anyother name.
In his eyes she eclipses and predominates thewhole of her sex.
It was not that he felt any emotion akin to lovefor Irene Adler.
All emotions, and that one particularly, were abhorrent to his cold, precise but admirablybalanced mind.
He was, I take it, the most perfect reasoning andobserving machine that the world has seen, but asa lover he would have placed himself in a falseposition.
He never spoke of the softer passions, save with ajibe and a sneer.
They were admirable things for the observer,excellent for drawing the veil from men's motivesand actions.
But for the trained reasoner to admit such intrusions into his own delicate and finely adjustedtemperament was to introduce a distracting factorwhich might throw a doubt upon all his mentalresults.
Grit in a sensitive instrument, or a crack in oneof his own high-power lenses, would not be moredisturbing than a strong emotion in a nature suchas his.
And yet there was but one woman to him, and thatwoman was the late Irene Adler, of dubious andquestionable memory.
I had seen little of Holmes lately. My marriagehad drifted us away from each other.
My own complete happiness, and the Holmes-centeredinterests which rise up around the man who firstfinds himself master of his own establishment,were sufficient to absorb all my attention, whileHolmes, who loathed every form of society with hiswhole bohemian soul, remained in our lodgings inBaker Street, buried among his old books, andalternating from week to week between cocaine andambition, the drowsiness of the drug, and thefierce energy of his own keen nature.
He was still, as ever, deeply attracted by thestudy of crime, and occupied his immense facultiesand extraordinary powers of observation infollowing out those clues, and clearing up thosemysteries which had been abandoned as hopeless bythe official police.
From time to time I heard some vague account ofhis doings, of his summons to Odessa in the caseof the Trepoff murder, of his clearing up of thesingular tragedy of the Atkinson brothers at Trincomalee, and finally of the mission which he hadaccomplished so delicately and successfully forthe reigning family of Holland.
Beyond these signs of his activity, however, whichI merely shared with all the readers of the dailypress, I knew little of my former friend andcompanion.
One night, it was on the 20th of March, 1888, Iwas returning from a journey to a patient, for Ihad now returned to civil practice, when my wayled me through Baker Street.
As I passed the well-remembered door, which mustalways be associated in my mind with my wooing,and with the dark incidence of the study in Scarlet, I was seized with a keen desire to see Holmesagain, and to know how he was employing hisextraordinary powers.
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His rooms were brilliantly lit, and, even as Ilooked up, I saw his tall, spare figure pass twicein a dark silhouette against the blind.
He was pacing the room swiftly, eagerly, with hishead sunk upon his chest and his hands claspedbehind him.
To me, who knew his every mood and habit, hisattitude and manner told their own story.
He was at work again.
He had risen out of his drug-created dreams andwas hot upon the scent of some new problem.
I rang the bell and was shown up to the chamberwhich had formerly been in part my own.
His manner was not effusive.
It seldom was, but he was glad, I think, to seeme.
With hardly a word spoken, but with a kindly eye,he waved me to an armchair, threw across his caseof cigars, and indicated a spirit case and a gasogene in the corner.
Then he stood before the fire and looked me overin his singular introspective fashion.
"'Wetlock' suits you," he remarked.
"'I think, Watson, that you have put on seven-and-a-half pounds since I saw you.'"
"'Seven?' I answered.
"'Indeed, I should have thought a little more.
Just a trifle more, I fancy, Watson.
And in practice again, I observe.
You did not tell me that you intended to go intoharness.
Then, how do you know?
I see it, I deduce it.
How do I know that you have been getting yourselfvery wet lately, and that you have a most clumsyand careless servant girl?'
"'My dear Holmes,' said I, 'this is too much.
You would certainly have been burned, had youlived a few centuries ago.
It is true that I had a country walk on Thursdayand came home in a dreadful mess, but as I havechanged my clothes I can't imagine how you deduceit.
As to Mary Jane, she is incorrigible, and my wifehas given her notice, but there, again, I fail tosee how you work it out.'
He chuckled to himself and rubbed his long,nervous hands together.
"'It is simplicity itself,' said he, 'my eyes tellme that on the inside of your left shoe, justwhere the firelight strikes it, the leather isscored by six almost parallel cuts.
Obviously they have been caused by someone who hasvery carelessly scraped round the edges of thesole in order to remove crusted mud from it.
Hence, you see, my double deduction that you hadbeen out in vile weather, and that you had aparticularly malignant boot-slitting specimen ofthe London Slavey.
As to your practice, if a gentleman walks into myroom smelling of iotiform, with a black mark ofnitrate of silver upon his right forefinger, and abulge on the right side of his top hat to showwhere he has secreted his stethoscope,
I must be dull, indeed, if I do not pronounce himto be an active member of the medical profession.'
I could not help laughing at the ease with whichhe explained his process of deduction.
"'When I hear you give your reasons,' I remarked,'the thing always appears to me to be soridiculously simple that I could easily do itmyself, though at each successive instance of yourreasoning I am baffled until you explain yourprocess.
And yet I believe that my eyes are as good asyours.'
"'Quite so,' he answered, lighting a cigarette,and throwing himself down into an armchair.
You see, but you do not observe.
The distinction is clear.
For example, you have frequently seen the stepswhich lead up from the hall to this room.
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Frequently.
How often?
Well, some hundreds of times.
Then how many are there?
How many?
I don't know.
Quite so.
You have not observed.
And yet you have seen.
That is just my point.
Now, I know that there are seventeen steps,because I have both seen and observed.
By the way, since you are interested in theselittle problems, and since you are good enough tochronicle one or two of my trifling experiences,you may be interested in this.'
He threw over a sheet of thick, pink-tinted notepaper which had been lying open upon the table.
It came by the last post, said he.
Read it aloud.
The note was undated, and without either signatureor address.
There will call upon you tonight, at a quarter toeight o'clock, it said, a gentleman who desires toconsult you upon a matter of the very deepestmoment.
Your recent services to one of the royal houses ofEurope have shown that you are one who may safelybe trusted with matters which are of an importancewhich can hardly be exaggerated.
This account of you we have from all quartersreceived.
Be in your chamber then at that hour, and do nottake it amiss if your visitor wear a mask.
This is indeed a mystery, I remarked.
What do you imagine that it means?
I have no data yet.
It is a capital mistake to theorise before one hasdata.
Insensibly one begins to twist facts to suittheories, instead of theories to suit facts.
But the note itself.
What do you deduce from it?
I carefully examined the writing, and the paperupon which it was written.
The man who wrote it was presumably well-to-do, Iremarked, endeavouring to imitate my companion'sprocesses.
Such paper could not be bought under half a crowna packet.
It is peculiarly strong and stiff.
Peculiar, that is the very word, said Holmes.
It is not an English paper at all.
Hold it up to the light.
I did so, and saw a large E with a small G, a P,and a large G with a small T woven into thetexture of the paper.
What do you make of that? asked Holmes.
The name of the maker, no doubt, or his monogram,rather.
Not at all.
The G with a small T stands for Gesellschaft,which is the German for company.
It is a customary contraction like our co.
P, of course, stands for papier.
Now for the egg.
Let us glance at our continental gazetteer.
He took down a heavy brown volume from hisshelves.
Egglo, Egglenets, here we are, Egria.
It is in a German-speaking country, in Bohemia,not far from Carlsbad.
Remarkable as being the scene of the death of Wallenstein, and for its numerous glass factories andpaper mills.
Ha, ha, my boy, what do you make of that?
His eyes sparkled, and he sent up a great blue triumphant cloud from his cigarette.
The paper was made in Bohemia, I said.
Precisely.
And the man who wrote the note is a German.
Do you note the peculiar construction of thesentence,
This account of you we have from all quartersreceived.
A Frenchman or Russian could not have writtenthat.
It is the German who is so uncourteous to hisverbs.
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It only remains, therefore, to discover what iswanted by this German who writes upon Bohemianpaper and prefers wearing a mask to showing hisface.
And here he comes, if I am not mistaken, toresolve all our doubts.
As he spoke there was the sharp sound of horses'hoofs and grating wheels against the curb,followed by a sharp pull at the bell.
Holmes whistled.
A pair, by the sound, said he.
Yes, he continued, glancing out of the window.
A nice little broom and a pair of beauties.
A hundred and fifty guineas apiece.
There's money in this case, Watson, if there isnothing else.
I think that I had better go, Holmes.
Not a bit, Doctor.
Stay where you are.
I am lost without my Boswell.
And this promises to be interesting.
It would be a pity to miss it.
But your client.
Never mind him.
I may want your help, and so may he.
Here he comes.
Sit down in that arm chair, Doctor, and give usyour best attention.
A slow and heavy step, which had been heard uponthe stairs and in the passage, paused immediatelyoutside the door.
Then there was a loud and authoritative tap.
Come in, said Holmes.
A man entered who could hardly have been less thansix feet six inches in height, with the chest andlimbs of a Hercules.
His dress was rich with a richness which would, inEngland, be looked upon as akin to bad taste.
Heavy bands of astracan were slashed across thesleeves and fronts of his double-breasted coat,
while the deep blue cloak which was thrown overhis shoulders was lined with flame-coloured silk
and secured at the neck with a brooch whichconsisted of a single flaming barrel.
Boots which extended halfway up his calves, andwhich were trimmed at the tops with rich brownfur,
completed the impression of barbaric opulencewhich was suggested by his whole appearance.
He carried a broad-brimmed hat in his hand, whilehe wore across the upper part of his face,
extending down past the cheekbones, a black visored mask, which he had apparently adjusted thatvery moment,
for his hand was still raised to it as he entered.
From the lower part of the face he appeared to bea man of strong character, with a thick, hanginglip,
and a long, straight chin suggestive of resolutionpushed to the length of obstinacy.
You had my note? he asked with a deep harsh voiceand a strongly marked German accent.
I told you that I would call.
He looked from one to the other of us, as ifuncertain which to address.
Pray take a seat, said Holmes.
This is my friend and colleague, Dr. Watson, whois occasionally good enough to help me in mycases.
Whom have I the honour to address?
You may address me as the Count von Kramm, a Bohemian nobleman.
I understand that this gentleman, your friend, isa man of honour and discretion,
whom I may trust with a matter of the most extremeimportance.
If not, I should much prefer to communicate withyou alone.
I rose to go, but Holmes caught me by the wristand pushed me back into my chair.
It is both, or none, said he.
You may say before this gentleman anything whichyou may say to me.
The Count shrugged his broad shoulders.
Then I must begin, said he, by binding you both toabsolute secrecy for two years.
At the end of that time the matter will be of noimportance.
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At present it is not too much to say that it is ofsuch weight it may have an influence upon Europeanhistory.
I promise, said Holmes.
And I.
You will excuse this mask, continued our strangevisitor.
The august person who employs me wishes his agentto be unknown to you,
and I may confess at once that the title by whichI have just called myself is not exactly my own.
I was aware of it, said Holmes dryly.
The circumstances are of great delicacy,
and every precaution has to be taken to quenchwhat might grow to be an immense scandal
and seriously compromise one of the reigningfamilies of Europe.
To speak plainly, the matter implicates the greathouse of Ormstein, hereditary kings of Bohemia.
I was also aware of that, murmured Holmes,settling himself down in his armchair and closinghis eyes.
Our visitor glanced with some apparent surprise atthe languid, lounging figure of the man
who had been no doubt depicted to him as the mostincisive reasoner and most energetic agent inEurope.
Holmes slowly reopened his eyes and lookedimpatiently at his gigantic client.
If Your Majesty would condescend to state yourcase, he remarked, I should be better able toadvise you.
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